


Sex rescue

by mrs_mozzie



Category: Airwolf, Bar Rescue RPF
Genre: Crossover, Deliberate Badfic, Deliberately Bad Fanart, Don't Read This, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, Purple Prose, Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2015-03-29
Packaged: 2018-03-20 06:06:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3639564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrs_mozzie/pseuds/mrs_mozzie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jon taffer rescues those people in Airwolf from bad sex!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sex rescue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [debirlfan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/debirlfan/gifts).



This year, 6500 bars will have people having sex in them. If things domt change soon, Michael Coldsmith Briggs III and Caitlin O'Shannessy will have bad sex in the Airwolf Helicopter Bar in the Airwolf Helicopter. 

Airwolf is the helicopter from the 1980s American eponymous television series. Its fictional features included stratospheric ceiling, stealth noise signature, a wide range of weapons and supersonic speed. And there's a baf in it.

Michael Coldsmith-Briggs III is the Firm's point man on the Airwolf project. And he's about to have sex with Caitlin O'Shannessy, a former helicopter pilot for the Texas Highway Patrol. 

Havingn sex on a bar is not just sex. It's a science. From the heighth of the stools to where your eyes fall firsg on a menu, no one knows more about bar sex than Jon Taffer.

TAFFER i dont embrace excuses. I embrace sloutions. 

Over the past 36 years, jon has transforemd hundreds of sex lives worldwide.

TAFFER i believe that you can do this.

His years of experience and no-nonsense approach--

TAFFER do something about it!

Has turned bad sex

TAFFER clean this place out!

Into money-making good sex.

TAFFER so there it is, the airwolf's bar.

Jon is warching the sex outside in his suv. In addition to the cameras following thr sex im thr bar, jon has placed surveillance cameras around the bar to watch the sex live.

MICHAEL I'm about to put my man rod in you.

WOMAN okay.

MICHAEL I'm. Sliding into the depths of your slippery see

CAITLIN okay

Both are moaning as if they are taking a really hard math test.

JON That's it. I've had enough. I'm gonna go in there and rip him a new one!!!!"

Jon walks into the airwolf bar. Shakes Michael ans caitlin's hands.

JON Jon Taffer. May i ask what the hell you are doing?

MICHAEL were having sex on a bar.

JON NO that is not the way you have sex on a bar! You're not elevating her on the bar right! You're not far enough in her! Have you touched her clit yet! When was the last time you cleaned this bar!

MICHAEL Two days ago.

Jon rubs hands on bar.

JON TWO days ago? Does this look like this was cleaned Two days ago!! SHUT IT DOWN!!!!!! SHUT IT DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Author's Note:**

> never seen Airwolf before lol


End file.
